Time for the annual blog post! Not really, but I realize my updates have been at a min here at annatothemax. The post-grad life hasn’t been terribly thrilling, inspiration wanes, I’m pretty sure the majority of the 3 or so people who visit this page do so completely by accident, blah blah, excuses. But back to the topic of my title. As of Saturday at approximately 4:43 pm, I became a plasma donor. I feel a little guilty carrying the title of “donor” because is it really donating if you’re being reimbursed? And not just financially; they also gave me a pack of crackers and some watery mac and cheese! With perks like that, it’s easy to see why half the people in there were homeless and the other half were college boys. Or recently released from prison, like the person opposite me. It takes all kinds, apparently. And as you probably know by now, I love finding myself in bizarre circumstances with eccentric people so I was EATING THIS UP.
Before you all start hounding me for more information (good grief, the mail bag has been soo heavy lately, all these fan letters, gift cards, tickets to hockey games, handpainted porcelain teacups and other tchotchkes [love using that word], family heirlooms, you readers just don’t know when to stop!) I’ll answer the questions I’m sure are at the forefront of your minds so you’ll understand how I came to be lying on a bed in section 1 of the donor floor trying to look anywhere but at the needle in my arm and the bad Jennifer Lopez movie on the television in front of me.
What on earth has driven you to the point of desperation that you’re willing to sell your plasma? I’m going to Africa this summer for 3 months that I can tell already will be revolutionizing. This is costing several
George Washingtons Ben Franklins Grover Clevelands (yep, definitely had to look that one up) and let me tell you, I haven’t climbed too many rungs in the corporate ladder since my days as Service Desk Worker Girl and Nanny Anna. But I’m not taking the typical fundraising routes; oh no, no lemonade stands or car washes for me, I’d rather pawn some of my intercellular fluid.
Are you going to do it again? Yes, tomorrow in fact. And according to one handout, if I can gain 11 pounds in the next 24 hours I’ll qualify for the 825 ML group!
Do you recommend becoming a plasma donor? It’s a great way to meet people, enjoy a snack, and be tested for HIV–all for free! What’s not to love?
Did you feel a sense of pride thinking of the people you’ll be helping? I’d say it was more a sense of…wooziness. Actually I felt fine the entire time. I may have felt a bit accomplished upon noticing the clever/cheesy banner that pretty much summed it up: “Coagulation! You’re a donor.”